The first of my promise to myself (and all of you who tuned in to reverb13) to write weekly is here on day 2! I felt so good about getting on with my resolution to write until I actually sat down and thought what will I write? The whole reason I was never a blogger to begin with is creeping back at me…
I’m not that interesting.
Who would even care?
Why am I putting myself through this stress?
I’m putting my foot down. These are negative thoughts. Is whether I am interesting to the general public really relevant if I’m writing for myself? Nope. And therefore, if no one cares, does it really matter? Nope. It may be stressful at first to try to make something from nothing, but practice is what helps us get better at anything.
During reverb, I had a blank sheet each day but was given a prompt to be creative. I was given a goal. So, my creativity and expression was purely reactive. I’m good at that.
I work for a government contractor as a pricing analyst. It’s quite a fun job if you (a) love math (b) like creating giant excel files with lots of cool formulas or (c) can even use the words cool and formulas in the same sentence. I’m a total nerd but I hide it well. The thing that I love about it is that I get to create (and I get to do it from home 3x/week). I start with a blank excel file and my job is to get every detail of a project captured in terms of hours, cost, profit, schedule, risk, and analyze that against what our competitors may propose, do trade-off analyses to make sure that our risk is balanced with our return and our solution is worth the price we’re asking for. So even thought I start with a blank sheet, I have a goal, and my creativity is purely reactive.
I now have a blank sheet but no prompt. My goal is simply to write, express, or convey anything that comes to mind. This is hard for me. Outside of my comfort zone. But I’m going to keep trying…