Day 18 – Ah Ha Moment – Did you have one this year?
New things occur to me every day that should just be common knowledge. Like how New York has not one but two football teams. You say Giants, I say yep I know they represent New York. You say Jets, and I say who??? You say New York Jets and I say, but they are the Giants I thought…
Ah Ha! G is shaking her head in shame right now reading this.
Anyway, the good news is that I’m usually not too hard on myself. I’m not a grown-up-with-it big-time fan of football so how would I know?? I love eating pizza and hanging on the couch reading my magazines and books while a game is on, and spending the time with my wife, who luuurves football. In case you were wondering, divergent interests occur just as much in same sex relationships as they do in traditional ones. Opposites attract!
I also have become aware that as much as I make fun of myself for having some minor autistic traits like rocking back and forth and shaking while I think — and being a bit rainmain with mathy stuff — that there might actually be something to that. My Ah Ha moment was when I read an article about Jerry Seinfeld explaining how he feels he lands on the spectrum because of his alternate mindset and taking everything very literally. He later took these statements back. I’m quite sure it was to not offend anyone who has a true struggle with autism by putting his very minor plight out there. But, I do that too. To a fault. I’m acutely aware of my introversion and measured about the way I handle it. I think I’m on the spectrum. But perhaps, mostly in a good way. As long as I can control the rocking…
My real psychological state-of-mind changer Ah Ha this year I have talked about in many posts. My first here. But I will say it again. I think this is so important for everyone to understand about one another – there would be so much more peace in the world.
Don’t assume that once someone knows things the way you know them, they will choose what you choose.
This statement STILL slaps me right in the face! AH HA. Human beings are so diverse in thought and action – we are complex emotional creatures. There may be two of us alike in a world of 7.28B (current figure) but the possibility you come face to face with that person is less likely than winning the lottery. I did the math LOL.
We fight with each other all the time over who is right and who is wrong. Who does something better. We are competitive with each other in problem solving. We take time every day to persuade others to think the way we do (I’m doing it right now! HA). All that stuff is normal and OK – but hear this… You are only you and your way of doing things is only for you. Sharing your ways of doing and thinking with the world is a good thing. Setting an example through positive action is enabling. But expecting your ways of doing and thinking to be adopted by all is futile. Because we are all so different.
Next time you want to argue with someone over why you think you’re right, instead ask them why they feel the way they do and try to gain some understanding and perspective. You still might not agree, but you don’t have to. Just like they don’t have to always agree with you. But, if you at least try to understand where they are coming from you are gaining an understanding of them as a person and it draws you closer together instead of driving a wedge.
Thank you, Seth Godin.